The Misadventures of O and J : Best Laid Plans

O and I just booked our 2nd to the last supplier today. Booking them left me amused. See, this planning of ours has a recurring theme that leaves me amused and somehow, relieved.

Whenever O and I gear up to find a wedding supplier, we do extensive research. Of course, it's always our goal to find what fits our budget but delivers the best quality that fits our taste. Then, after weeks of research, we narrow it down to the top two or three suppliers that we think best. We further our research and try to decide among our choices BUT at the last minute that we're about to decide, we give each other bouts of second thoughts and end up finding another supplier in a much shorter time that fits our criteria to a T. 

Yes, this was how we were able to book our place, our caterer, our preps venue as well as how we found our house.

On our way home, I mentioned this to O and how I found it amusing. He, on the other hand, pointed out how everything shows God's workmanship and how God always makes His best plans prevail.

Amazing! God is surely amazing!   

Redeemed

More than being victorious, I would like to be called redeemed.

I have always been reminded that as a Christian I have been made victorious. In the course of its repetition, I realized the danger this statement contains. In hearing this again and again, I have reduced its interpretation by running after the successes in life believing that the promise of victory is Christ's way of beckoning people to follow Him.

But, the Christian way of life is not of pure victories. Any Christians' story is a story of redemption. I am not victorious but rather I was redeemed by a victorious God. Christ invites us to follow Him because only He is victorious and that in Him we will find our redemption. 

More than being victorious, I would like to be called redeemed because I would like to be reminded over and over again that I cannot be anything of value apart from the victorious God who saved me. 

Graciousness

There are a lot of inspirational books out there that effectively teaches us how to really follow Christ and without a doubt, I would love to read them all. I have actually encountered some that are so powerful I know reading them have really changed my life. I have always been a curious individual and as Christ's follower, I have always wanted to get to know more of Him and His teachings.

Now, my journey has brought me to search for a faith that matters. A faith that does not stop at knowing but also applying. If you've ever heard of the term "analysis-paralysis", my quest for more of God has a somewhat similar concept. I love to read books and sometimes find myself amazed at the revelations I get all the while thinking that I would be needing all these knowledge later.

But, God was never a God of later. God is a here and now God. And in the middle of this search, God made me realize that in order to act, it's really not about the theories. In order to act, it's really just about remembering and realizing that as someone who has been redeemed, God has transformed me to be a dispenser of His grace.

Random Conversations

My mind is full of conversations with random strangers I "meet" in my daily commute to and fro office.     I never do say them out loud lest I might get misunderstood. But as this is my turf, maybe letting it out here won't be such a hassle:

To the MMDA people who thought of the new traffic scheme in EDSA

"Gusto ko pong matuwa sa thought na at least kayo may tina-try to improve the traffic situation pero di nyo po ba talaga napapansin ang epekto ng scheme nyo sa commuters... para po kasing na-prioritize nyo masyado ang mga can afford ng kotse"

To MRT management

"Really? Ganito na naman? Hanggang kelan po ba? Wala ba talaga kayong paki sa amin?"

To the guy who offered his seat to me sa MRT

"Kuya, maraming salamat po. Hindi mo lang alam anong nagawa nito sa buong araw ko."

To the hot-headed person announcing his woes but still going to take the MRT

"Araw-araw naman pong ganito, hindi pa po ba kayo napapagod sa kakareklamo?"

To the people in the train who just won't budge to give space to others

"Sana na-ge-gets nyo na tulad nyo, ung mga taong nasa platform, may pupuntahan din."

To MRT riders that hates being pushed to and fro

"Can't you just be thankful that you're on your way already?"

To the Buendia MRT - Washington barkers

"Kaunting concern naman po sa trabaho ninyo... pwede naman natin pagbutihin e... wag naman po sahod lang ng sahod ng barya..."

To those people who like cutting in the line

"Seriously?! Di nyo ba talaga kami nakikita?"

To the long-haired girl in the jeep sitting beside me

"Ate, I admire your hair pero di ko naman sya gusto mapunta sa face ko lalo na sa bibig ko"

To God

"Sorry po sa mga naiisip ko. Kayo na po bahalang magturo sa kanila at sa akin."

Mindfulness

Today, God reminded me to be mindful of my actions. He came to the world bearing the message of love and He expects me to bear this news in my thoughts, words and actions.

Naisip nyo na ba itong katagang ito “Grabe… parang di kristiyano to… “? Ako, first time ever ko naisip yan today at the moment naisip ko sya inisip ko kaagad kung ano kayang naiisip ng ibang tao sa akin, Christian man o hindi.

I’m far from being the good Christ’s follower that people usually expects. But, with God’s grace, I strive to be one. I just hope I don’t cause anyone to stumble or think bad of God, Christ or Christians in general.

THIS is what I understand from this verse:

“I no longer live, but Christ lives in me “ - (Gal. 2:20)

I pray that when people meet and see me, they really do see the Christ that’s living in me.

Lead Like Jesus

There are the bossy, know-it-all ones who think that just because they’ve seen it done by others and heard the theories word per word they have every right to give out instructions not to mention, criticize how others work. There are also the OC, micro-managers who like to get their hands dirty and seem helpful at first but ends up leaving no room for others to learn and mature.

Both approaches are flawed. One may be irritating than the other but both are destructive to people who encounter it.

This was the debate in my mind that ensued the other day: If I were to be a leader, how would I really want to lead? I was actually so bothered by the thought that I ended up praying to God about it.

He, in turn, led me to this verse and realization:

   HEB 4:15 For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are--yet was without sin. 16 Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.

This is how God wants us to lead. Like Jesus.

While on earth, Jesus gave a lot of instructions with the call for us to be perfect not to boss us around and act like some theoretical know-it-all. He gave us a lot of instructions because He was able to experience the things we are experiencing in our lives: temptation, discouragement, disappointment, persecution, etc. Yet, Jesus did not micro-managed everyone’s lives and shoved his principle down our throats but rather, shared what He knows with a promise that should one chooses to follow, blessings will come. As our leader, Jesus got His hands dirty by living it out here on earth. As someone who knows [a lot] better, His presence is the hope that we have to get out of the mess we are in as He is always ready to share what He knows provided that we ask.

This is how Jesus is. This is how Jesus leads. I hope to follow in His footsteps should I be called to lead.

To God always be the glory!    

A Prayer

Speaking slower than usual
These images keep haunting my dreams
I'm trying harder than usual
But my efforts fail me
I'm bordering insanity

Teach me how to feel what's real
Let me learn to love and heal
Keep me far from the edge
I beg of you

Save me from these turbulent tides inside myself
I'm drowning deep in my sorrows I keep on falling
Pull me back to stand on my own two feet
And never leave me
Just keep me company

Holding longer than usual
My hand's still shaking, I'm tightening my grip and
I'm thinking louder than usual
The world can't contain me
This yearning's too much to defeat

I won't stop, no, won't stop
Until you save me from these
Turbulent tides inside myself
I'm drowning deep in my sorrows I keep on falling
Pull me back to stand on my own two feet
And never leave me
Just keep me company

Teach me how to feel what's real
Let me learn to love and heal
Keep me far from the edge
I beg of you

Save me from these turbulent tides inside myself
I'm drowning deep in my sorrows I keep on falling
Pull me back to stand on my own two feet
And never leave me
Just keep me company.

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Our questions can keep on coming 'til we find ourselves lost inside the maze we created.

Finding our way back can only be achieved when we pray for help. 

I thank God that while I am unable to utter the words, He provided it to me.  

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credits to Walkie Talkies